Torn Clay

I make my own path and find my space.

I spotted you, a wanderer seeking solace.

I waited for you to direct me with your instructions.

Instead, you left me to my transgressions.
You controlled me with your silence and your two-word messages,

Easy to push a button and do a Houdini-disappearance.  

All I ever wanted, was for you to stay.

It was clear, you didn't want me, I was in your way.

Breaking me down when I ran to you like pouring rain.

But, I recognized your hatred from a mile away,

I always wondered if you felt the same way.

With child-like innocence, I gave in and let you play.

You told me that you didn't have time to lose.

My heart was never enough for you.

What about the times that you didn't care? 

If I was alive, dead, or just plain scared.

How could you be so intense with someone,

when you really didn't need them, after you're done.

I broke my own rules to follow your tracks

When you were lonely, I let you have me back.

You make a fool of me and think I don’t know.

You ignore me with a straight face, and put on a great show!

You think I wouldn't notice, that you didn't want me around.

I am neither blind nor sense-deprived, only standing my ground.

I guess I could have saved myself, with self-defence.

Every time you said "I can’t help you!” I helped myself.

Danced and sang my way, through the pain,

Deceiving myself that I didn't care for you, and now, I'm well trained.

You thought I am not capable and that I would cry.

But, I am capable of finding my way, through every kind of sky.

Now face a beautiful woman with a transcendent soul,

You can tear her apart, but she will always be whole.